When does the madness stop?

It is a fair question, but on the understanding prevention is better than cure, the better question is, where does the madness start?

Madness is largely a social construct, I am not worried about overstepping that line.  I am able to survive within conventional society.

But there is another sort of madness, more a turmoil, when you have more thoughts than you have categories to put them in.  An overspill of thought running about free of label.

The problem with tearing off the blinkers, removing the filters is sensory overload.  We must have all had the experience when surfing the net.  You are reading an article, its interesting to some degree or another.  It has a link to further reading, you cannot resist, “click”.  This is more interesting, it gets a bookmark.  Now thoughts are going through your head, “there must be books on this subject”.  Bring up the library service.  There certainly are books, it is easy to get a few reserved.

A few days later the library informs you the books have arrived.  Excellent, now you have a week or two of reading ahead of you.  You are learning exponentially, the books have further references, you want to read them too.

So far it is relatively healthy but you are fast approaching a line.  This is when you ask yourself, “How can I be actively involved in this?”

For me there is a looping mechanism at work.  I go for a stroll, an insect is seen, I wish to know more.  The internet is the instant educator.  Its turns out to be a common example, but there are many questions to be answered regarding this.  I see there are rarer examples, there is a survey going on, I can get involved, help map out the migratory habits of this brown object.  It can do no real harm to me, it will just be an added element on the walk, it will be fun.

It is fun, it adds something to the walk, I can identify various bugs as I stroll along.

I walk into a churchyard, as ever looking for the old and curious gravestones but the church itself is not of great interest to me.  But then I find an unusual element within the architecture of the Church, something not seen before.  How old is that oak chest that just sits there by the font?  How old is the font?

Now I am sinking deeper, there is easily 1000 years of church architecture to consider in most UK townscapes.  My history education is relatively extensive, British history 1485 – 1700 being a focus of it, religion is a major theme.  It interests me at the amateur level, freed from the constraints of having to learn it to regurgitate it onto A4 for an exam board it has become interesting again.

Things are beginning to get un-manageable.  I contemplate walks which will encompass esoteric church architectural feature.  But it does not come easily, this stuff has to be researched.  It can take days to organise a walk which was once just a matter of stepping outside the front door.

The experience is much more rewarding though, so it is worth the added effort, the planning, the effort is part of the process.  Ideas are springing into my head constantly.  Constructing the shortest possible walk between 3 churches with towers, 3 with spires, 3 with no such thrust, 3 with lychgates.  How many churches can I walk too in 3 miles.  The “Trinity tour” my basic building block.

Now I get there, its no good just seeing it, there has to be a record of it, my record of it.  There might be 10,000 photographs of it but there is a strong need for me to capture the moment I was there.

The photograph does not come out right.  It looks nothing like the better efforts I have seen.  My memory has been cheated, that blurry grey blob was not what I saw.  The answer is simple, more learning, more technique, more practice.

Interest piles on top of interest.  I am walking down the street, trying to see a bug which moments before was just a shadow on the pavement.  I am framing images in my head, trying different sentence forms for blogging.

I walked south of Mistley a few weeks ago, and just through a small section of Manningtree.  Along the walk I saw two hares in the field.  Hares long associated with witches.  Mistley and Manningtree, a dark history of persecution, stamping ground of the Witchfinder General.  He is said to be buried in a churchyard that is now only ruins.  Walks are planned based on witchcraft trials.  Once again the internet is surfed, the library consulted, the process continues, another layer of complexity and interest added.

This is still well within the sphere of the sane.  Planning a walk between my name (an old Hall) and my brothers name (a farm that no longer exists) begins to show signs of flakiness.  Given our names, there is probably only one such walk in England, certainly that can be done within a day.  Other “name themed” walks are considered.

Having discovered I can walk from my name to my brothers name in a day, via a farm that no longer exists a plan forms in my head.  A whole new walking theme.  Walks to places that don’t exist and of course walks from places that don’t exist.  Old maps are studied, place names, farms, barrows carefully plotted.  Can I follow old field systems that are now carparks, is there any evidence of the rural past?  A whole theme of rural walks in an urban environment exist develops in my mind.

This is just the stuff amassed to amuse myself between major, perhaps more mainstream, walking goals.  There is only one certainty, the next time I step outside of the door, it will be the start of many more walking ideas than it will complete.

As long as not for one moment do I think any of this will ever be completed in one lifetime a grip on reality will be maintained.

The madness starts when the ideas stop.